Sit Next to Me Mom

by | Homeschooling | 2 comments

Dear Laurie,

Is it necessary for my child to do all his schoolwork on his own? I sit on the couch with my 10-year-old son and help him with the introduction to his assignments. For example, with his math lessons, I go through the lesson with him (takes us five minutes), and then I’m off and he continues totally on his own. We do basically the same thing for all of his subjects. Today, I told him that at some time he must begin to do his own “intro” work. Just after I mentioned it to him — he didn’t say anything — big teardrops fell one by one on his papers. How does one do the weaning?


Your child apparently likes very much having you help him begin. Let him know you love doing the introductory work with him, and continue doing it. He does not want to be left totally on his own, and these minutes of introductory work may be providing a measure of accountability which he feels he needs. Over the next couple of years this will all change, and he won’t need your help — indeed, he may even resent it if you tried. Help him through the transition. I would give my right arm to have a little boy want me to sit next to him and help with schoolwork. Enjoy it while you can.



  1. Beth

    What a beautiful response, Laurie! We are so pushed to push our children to grow up. One of the beauties of homeschooling is that incredible bond between parent and child; one that is God-given. I believe there is great wisdom in allowing children to be children for as long as they need to be. Sometimes it is hard for me to remember when the the world screams at me that my children need to grow up faster and be more independent. Thanks for the reminder!

  2. Vonda

    Mrs. Laurie,
    I was moved to tears at this response! So often I feel like I’m battling myself–I feel like I’m hindering their progress if I sit beside them as they do work I know they’re capable of doing alone. At the same time, it breaks my heart to walk away when I know they want me close. Thank you for confirming that my created, nurturing, nature is beneficial to my children and not harming their development!


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